One of the best things I ever learned in a class was a lesson covered in Small Group Communication. Dr. Pogue introduced us to the five different personality types, and I was amused to realize that, of the five living in our house, each of us was a different one.
The first type is the Blamer. This one is self-explanatory, really, but in a nutshell, the Blamer never sees that he or she did anything wrong. Everything is the fault of someone else, and the Blamer never is the cause of any wrongdoing. You can't really reason with a Blamer, either. They will probably blame you for it.
The second type is the Blamer's opposite, the Placater. This is the person who blames him- or herself for everything. Rather than blaming anyone else, one who placates will accept full blame for everything, even things that that person isn't to blame for, which makes this type just as faulty in its own way as the Blamers.
The third type is the Computer. The Computer does not show emotions. This person is robot-like in that regard. Getting a Computer to break down is very difficult, if not impossible at times. This type of person is very even-keeled, but even though they seem completely laid-back, they are really just hiding their feelings so deeply that often they aren't even aware of them.
The fourth type is the Distractor. The Distractor is lost in his own head. You can identify a Distractor by asking him a question. If you get no answer or hint that the person heard you, ask again. If he responds with "Whut?" then you've likely got a Distractor in front of you.
The Distractor will do anything to shift attention away from themselves, particularly when being called to task about something involving responsibility. They don't want to admit that it's happening, and they will try to make you forget that it's happening, too. Though this type can be comical at times, ultimately it is very frustrating to get a Distractor to focus and do what they need to do.
Finally, the fifth type is the Leveler. The Leveler is the most well-adjusted of the five types. This person can also be referred to as a Fixer. The Leveler tries to make everything better, but not by sacrificing themselves in the process. They are honest, up-front, real, and caring, but they're not afraid to do what they need to do to get the job done. They neither blame nor avoid. They meet problems head-on, without hesitation.
While none of our cases in my family are extreme to the extent that they were when I took this class, we have a classic Blamer in our lives that should be pictured in the textbooks when this personality type is mentioned. I guess that's what made me remember that long-ago lesson, and realize that some things really do stick with you. Thank you, Dr. Pogue, and for the rest of you, which type are YOU?
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